The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos Why Having the Courage to Defy Makes us Happier (with Dr Sunita Sah)

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We all go along with things we don’t want to do… or worse, things that make us feel uncomfortable or morally uneasy. We comply for lots of reasons. We don’t want to make trouble, or upset our friends, our bosses or people in authority. But Dr Sunita Sah says we should be more ready to defy.

Defy: the Power of No in a World That Demands Yes is one of Dr Laurie’s favorite books of 2025, so she invited Sunita to explain how we can say no more often and what that means for improving our happiness.

(With thanks to the Milgram family for allowing us to use the archive audio in this episode. It’s from Stanley Milgram Papers (MS 1406). Manuscripts and Archives, Yale University Library.)

The Host

Dr. Laurie Santos

Dr. Laurie Santos is Professor of Psychology and Head of Silliman College at Yale University. Professor and podcast host Dr. Laurie Santos is an expert on human cognition and the…